CHICAGO—Pulling again the covers to disclose a two-inch splotch within the center of his mattress, native man Dave Reardon reportedly handled his date, Sandra McAllister, to an amusing anecdote behind the stain on his sheets Monday. “It’s not what you assume—it’s really a reasonably comic story,” the totally nude 32-year-old stated to McAllister after her eyes locked straight onto the discolored space and he or she all of the sudden hesitated to get into the mattress. “Critically, it’s nothing. It was a protracted day at work, I used to be actually hungry, and I had this leftover tuna salad sandwich that I knew would actually hit the spot. And sadly, it was actually messy. I imply, I don’t usually eat mendacity down in mattress—clearly—however that day I was completely exhausted. So, it’s nothing gross. It’s at hip degree as a result of that’s the place the plate was, between my legs. I attempted to sponge off the worst of it, however it may be fairly powerful to wipe up these mayo stains as soon as they’re dry. That’s why it’s form of onerous and crusty there. Now, as for why I haven’t washed the sheets, there’s this complete different story about my journey to the laundromat that’s much more unbelievable!” At press time, sources confirmed Reardon and McAllister had agreed to only lay down a towel.
