BANGOR, ME—Tearing away the pall of shadow and distress that had as soon as cloaked his complete existence, an additional egg roll mistakenly thrown right into a takeout order at native Chinese language restaurant Panda Palace reportedly turned Allen Russo’s sole cause for dwelling this week. “There may be hope in this bleak world in spite of everything,” stated Russo, dropping to his knees and weeping with pleasure as he held the miraculous third deep-fried Chinese language roll earlier than him, its golden-brown wrapper shining like a flaming torch in the darkness of sheer existence and guiding him onward with a spark of chance that there could possibly be higher occasions forward. “Oh my God, good issues actually do occur. If a fry prepare dinner would possibly by chance drop an further appetizer into my orange hen order, then possibly all shouldn’t be misplaced. God bless this egg roll. It has taught me to dream once more—of a brighter tomorrow, of an excellent new day by which we are all graced with cabbage and shredded meat rolled right into a crispy and scrumptious bundle. Maybe on my subsequent go to they may even bear in mind to embody chopsticks and a few napkins in my takeout bag.” At press time, sources confirmed the person had been plunged again right into a deep and inescapable melancholy after burning the shit out of his mouth on the appetizer.
