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Friday, October 11, 2024

Humorous Fortune Cookie Sayings



Prediction: these humorous fortune cookie sayings will carry smiles throughout. You don’t even want so as to add “in mattress” to make them humorous. Inflict these humorous sayings and quick clear jokes in your dinner friends for a memorable meal. Laughter is the very best dessert!


Humorous Sayings:
Fortune Cookies, Group 1

Funny Fortune Cookie Sayings: Image of fortune cookie with paper coming out of it that reads: "Don't marry for money. You can borrow it cheaper."

1. Some days you’re pigeon, some days you’re statue. At present, carry umbrella.

2. Your actuality test about to bounce.

3. Smart individual by no means attempt to get even. Smart individual get odder.

4. Two days from now, tomorrow will probably be yesterday.

5. Your inferiority complicated not adequate. Strive more durable.

6. When chosen for jury obligation, inform choose “fortune cookie say responsible!”

7. Cease consuming now. Meals poisoning no enjoyable.

8. You’re cleverly disguised as accountable grownup.

9. Tomorrow at breakfast, hear rigorously: do what rice krispies inform you to.

10. Drive like hell, you’ll get there.


Quick Clear Jokes:
Fortune Cookies, Group 2

11. One who eat fortune cookie get awful dessert.

12. Okay to take a look at previous and future. Simply don’t stare.

13. Smart individual want both good manners or quick reflexes.

14. Soup was secret household recipe produced from toad. Hope you favored!

15. You’ll quickly have an out of cash expertise.

16. Chance of being seen instantly proportional to stupidity of act.

17. He who dies with most toys, nonetheless dies.

18. One who rests on laurels will get thorn in bottom.

19. Observe secure consuming. At all times use condiments.

20. One who give self haircut after rice wine will probably be buzzed.



Humorous Fortune Cookie
Sayings, Group 3

21. Two can dwell as cheaply as one, for half as lengthy.

22. Exhausting work repay in future. Laziness repay now.

23. Life is sexually transmitted situation.

24. Give individual fish, he eat for day. Educate individual to fish, he all the time scent humorous.

25. One who argue with fool is taken for idiot.

26. Look earlier than you leap. Or put on parachute.

27. The top is close to, would possibly as effectively have dessert.

28. This fortune no good. Strive one other.

29. Of all 27 options, operating away is finest.

30. Closed mouth gathers no toes.

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Humorous Fortune Cookie Sayings:
Group 4

31. Honeymoon must be like desk: 4 naked legs, no drawers.

32. Smart husband is one who thinks twice earlier than saying nothing.

33. On keyboard of life, all the time hold one finger on escape key.

34. You’re going nowhere, however at the very least path is fascinating.

35. Indecision is vital to flexibility.

36. Dijon vu — the identical mustard as earlier than.

37. A day with out sunshine is like evening.

38. You’re solely younger as soon as, however could be immature endlessly.

39. Be good to associates. You would possibly want them to empty your bedpan.

40. The fortune you search is in one other cookie.

Image of a fortune cookie and the fortune inside reading: "People will accept your idea much more readily if you tell them Ben Franklin said it first."


Humorous Fortune Cookie
Sayings, Group 5

41. Politicians are like diapers: change typically, and for identical purpose.

42. Atheism no enjoyable. No holidays.

43. Fats individual not afraid of heights – afraid of widths.

44. You’ve kleptomania. Take one thing for it.

45. When marriage outlawed, solely outlaws have in-laws.

46. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, flooring.

47. The older you get, the higher you have been.

48. Age is excessive worth to pay for maturity.

49. Procrastination is artwork of maintaining with yesterday.

50. A idiot and his cash are quickly partying.


Image of fortune cookie with paper fortune that says: "Man like parachute. If not there when you need him first time, then not need him again."



Bonus: 10 Extra

51. If at first you do not succeed, skydiving not for you.

52. Ninety-nine % of all attorneys give the remaining a nasty identify.

53. Best technique to discover misplaced object is purchase substitute.

54. Sensible husband purchase spouse effective china. Then she not belief him to scrub it.

55. Inside each previous individual is younger individual questioning what the hell occurred.

56. Expertise is what you might have left when every little thing else gone.

57. Solely distinction between rut and a grave is depth.

58. Everybody appear regular till you get to know them.

59. When blind main the blind……..get out of the way in which.

60. Pressure is who you assume try to be. Rest is who you’re.

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