LONDON—As the celebrated tennis occasion entered the quarterfinals, unenthused sources confirmed Tuesday that though Wimbledon continued to attempt to excite us, the ball nonetheless simply went backwards and forwards all day. “We actually want we might get excited by the ball going backwards and forwards, nevertheless it’s merely not occurring,” mentioned shrugging tennis fan Gerald Firth, who spoke on behalf of everybody else within the crowd on the Grand Slam event, in addition to these watching the matches on TV at residence and anybody who occurred to stumble throughout the purportedly thrilling highlights on information shops all over the world. “The identical two guys hitting the ball there, then there, then there, then there, on and on for hours, regardless of ample alternatives for the ball to go some other place. Attempt two balls, possibly? Something that isn’t one facet, after which the opposite facet. We get the impression that we’re speculated to assume enjoying on grass is cool or one thing, however that’s not likely doing a lot for us in the way in which of leisure. Then, even when we do handle to muster some pleasure in the course of the match, we’re not allowed to indicate it with clapping or cheering. We’re simply form of sitting right here ready for one thing to occur.” At press time, sources reported feeling briefly enthused by the prospect of a frozen lemonade from a Wimbledon vendor, however their indifference rapidly returned after they deemed the concession completely overpriced.
