Regardless of how vacuous and empty a person’s mind is, his life associate ought to all the time be dumber. The Onion requested males why they like low-IQ wives, and that is what they stated.
Daniel Barnes, Historian
“Regardless of the motive, my choice is by no means a mirrored image of my very own insecurities as a person.”
Isaiah Valdez, Gravedigger
“I’m a easy man. I simply need a good, conventional girl I can simply manipulate.”
Jack Thompson, Welder
“It makes it simpler to clarify to them why I’ve so many different wives.”
Frank Alonzo, Optician
“I’m the dumbest particular person at work, and I’m certain as hell not coming residence to being the dumbest particular person there too.”
Todd Polk, Development Employee
“A girl who can assume for herself is all the time lower than a month from breaking apart with me.”
Randall Judd, Microbiologist
“It could really feel good to win at Join 4 for as soon as.”
Mack Bowers, Economist
“I really feel safer in a relationship once I prevail at sorting objects by form and even shade.”
Brian Pearlman, Chef
“It’s lots simpler to cheat on somebody when you may simply distract them by ringing a small bell.”
Doug Vreeland, Mechanic
“A wedding between equals has the perfect likelihood to succeed.”
Eric Deming, Supply Driver
“They’re simpler to steal cash from.”
Howard Sahlman, Constructing Inspector
“Though IQ is an arbitrary rubric, it’s good to have a quantity to throw of their faces after they disagree with you.”
Kyle Hotchkiss, Musician
“I favor a cool, low-maintenance girl who’s comfortable simply being locked in a barn with some lettuce after intercourse.”
Jon Robinson, Psychologist
“There’s nothing extra endearing to me in a associate than somebody who repeatedly steps on rakes that pop up and hit them in face.”
Brandon Kirk, Contractor
“What can I say? I need dumb youngsters.”
Randy Mireaux, Veterinarian
“My final intercourse doll received actually boastful and bitchy after it acquired its grasp’s, so I’m not coping with that once more.”
Tristan Morrow, Physician
“I refuse to budge from my perception that Chester A. Arthur is the present U.S. president, and I received’t let anybody inform me in any other case.”
Eric Landry, Elements Specialist
“It seems like eugenics, so I’m on board.”
